I am so painfully shy around guys it kills me...advice please? SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY!?

Background info on me:


-rising senior in high school (17)


-5'8'; and I guess kind of slender (122 lbs idk if that is it?)


-I wear what I want (forever21, Hollister, A%26amp;F, dELiA*s, nothing ';scene'; or ';emo'; or stuff like that)


-girls tell me I am really beautiful but no guy has ever given me a compliment on how I look :(


-NEVERnever had a boyfriend! pshh or a first kiss for that matter





I keep thinking I'm some kind of freak or something...or maybe just freaking ugly! I have self esteem issues from when I was picked on a lot when I was younger and I guess I just never grew out of them.





I'm pretty concerned about how others view me but I like to think that I am not as superficial and dumb when it comes to viewing other people!





So basically I have like...2 guy friends. And they both have girlfriends! And I can't even talk to them normally!


It's like...I run out of things to talk about, and I can't look them in the eyes because I can just feel them staring at all the things that are wrong with me. We can have a shitload of fun when around other people but I guess I'm really uncomfortable being alone with guys!





Before one of them got a girlfriend we were at a pool and he invited me out to eat, just him and me and I totally freaked out and made my (girl) friend come with us.





And that's with guys I've know for a long time too!


With people I've just met I don't even know, my body just freezes up and my pulse gets super fast and I don't know what to say or how to act so I just stay silent and act like a total lame idiot!





Help me :(I am so painfully shy around guys it kills me...advice please? SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY!?
I'm speaking as a guy on the opposite side of the fence--who is still a little shy around girls but who was paralyzingly so in my teens--and I think I may have a solution to at least the ';fear'; part of your problem.





Don't focus on them as boys; focus on them as people!





While there are some obvious big differences between men and women, especially when it comes to romance, men and women are more alike on most things than they are different. So the next time you are alone with a guy and start freaking out, think, ';He is probably having the same worries that I am: do I look good enough? What does she think of me? Am I acting cool or awkward? etc.'; Because 99 times out of 100, the guy is having concerns at least pretty similar to the ones you are having.





Just accept the fact that dating (and relations between the sexes in general) are hopelessly awkward on both sides, and just shrug your shoulders and have fun. Just be yourself, realize that your fear is irrational, and (again) HAVE FUN! :)I am so painfully shy around guys it kills me...advice please? SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY!?
im the same btu im a guy lol. You probably aren't ugly or anything and you do sound a very ncie weight for your height. I was the same with self confidence but I think better of my self now but still am very shy.
id say that ur just going to have to step outa ur box. an maybe ull be happy that u did. if u make a mistake oh well. thats what life is about. learning from ur mistakes.
Don't worry. I'm 13 and I havn't had a boyfriend. I am pretty popular, but I get too shy around boys. Every guy that has asked me I have turned down because they were creeps. I dont even have any guy friends and its embarressing. Two years ago I wasnt popular, but when I started Jr. high, I became best friends with all the pretty cheerleaders, but not guys.
I feel like this too..





Try spending more time with boys..


And DON'T invite any of your girl-friends along..


You might feel extremely nervous to begin with but once you're there, you'll have no other option but to talk to boys..


This will give you a chance to be sociable to other people, whereas if you bring a friend along, then you'll probably back out of talking to boys and just talk to her instead..





Try to be more confident..


It's definitely a lot easier said than done..


But try smiling everytime you see a guy - that way, the atmosphere will become more relaxed..


Imagine them to be like your friends..


Don't think fo them as boys - just think of them as people who you've known for ages..





Conversations are always hard though with guys cos' girls and boys are so different in the way they think..


Try talking about something universal such as what you did over the weekend..


Make sure you look interested in what he's saying and make sure you sound interesting too..


Make a few jokes too if it's appropriate - that way, he can see that you have a good sense of humour..





Finally, I feel this is the least important but you could maybe try wearing clothes that would make you stand out more?!


Not too revealing otherwise they'd think you were too desperate but something a bit more girly with a pair of heels..


Something that catches their eye..





I hope I've helped - good luck! :)
i was the same way that your are now. i thought i was wicked ugly and so tall( i'm 5'10) i thought wow no guy ever talks about me like the other girls. what you have to do is have confidence in your self you have to know that your pretty and that guys might not talk to you because they don't really know you for who you really are. its not about clothes but its about your attitude toward your look. and when your hanging out with the guys be yourself and just be the normal you instead of trying to impress them. hope this helps :)
You would be a pretty popular girl if everyone spent as much time thinking about you as you think they do. You have to realize that people usually think about themselves most of the time--they are not analyzing every thing you do and say. Remember that you are not on a stage in the spotlight with all eyes on you. You are just like all the other girls, you just worry more than they do. When you talk to a guy, try to treat them like you would any friend, not as if they are more special than anyone else. Probably guys see you as unapproachable. Sometimes just smiling is enough to let others know you are a friendly person. There are probably plenty of things that interest you. That's what you should talk about, those things you are comfortable talking about--movies, music, whatever. Also, ask questions, guys love talking about themselves and it shows that you are interested in knowing them. Think ahead about questions you can ask anyone, then you'll be prepared when the conversation stalls.